Someone's Watching Over Me
by ninjasandbacon
Summary: “Yes I do! I hate him for leaving us! I hate him for dying, for making you like this! Do you know how it feels to watch your mother cry over a picture of your father every night? Do you know how it feels to hear that every time I close my eyes!” DS


_Daniel Jonah Humphrey_

_Loving Brother, Son, Husband and Father_

_December 6th, 1991 - September 26th 2027_

_Found myself today  
Oh I found myself and ran away  
Something pulled me back  
The voice of reason I forgot I had  
All I know is you're not here to say  
What you always used to say  
But it's written in the sky tonight_

Tears cascaded down Serena's face as she knelt down in front of the marble tombstone. It was raining and she didn't have an umbrella but she didn't care. Tracing each cut into the marble, the muddy ground ruined her white dress further and further. None of that meant anything to her anymore. Standing beside her were Rufus, Lily, Blair, Eric, Jenny, Nate, Alison, Chuck, Bart, and Ethan, her seventeen year old son.

All had tears running down their faces except Ethan and Bart. Bart just wasn't one to cry and Ethan was too destroyed to cry. Nate made a move to step forward but Ethan beat him to it. He placed a hand on Serena's shaking shoulder. "Mom. He's gone." The words were spoken quietly but clearly. "We can't do anything more."

_So I won't give up  
No I won't break down  
Sooner than it seems life turns around  
And I will be strong  
Even if it all goes wrong  
When I'm standing in the dark I'll still believe  
Someone's watching over me _

"I don't want to leave him." Serena said, her voice no more than a cracked, broken whisper. "I can't." Sobs overtook her as Nate and Eric helped her stand.

"Mom, he's the one that left us! He died!" Ethan said angrily. His father's death had bothered him a lot more than he let on. Part of him hated Dan for dying while another part missed him.

Serena's body shuddered as she looked up at her son and slapped him. Her small, trembling hand met his cheek with a loud smack. She dropped her hand, horrified at what she had done. "I.."

Ethan shook his head, taking a step back. He glared at her, cheek red and eyes distrusting. Only Lily, Rufus, Blair, Eric, and Nate remained now. The others had walked away, the moment Ethan had yelled at Serena. "I _hate_ you!" He exclaimed angrily, tears pooling in his eyes. He wiped them away with the sleeve of his black suit. "I hate him too!"

_Seen that ray of light  
And it's shining on my destiny  
Shining all the time  
And I wont be afraid  
To follow everywhere it's taking me  
All I know is yesterday is gone  
And right now I belong  
To this moment to my dreams_

"Don't say that." Serena whispered, looking faint. "You don't mean it."

"Yes I do! I hate him for leaving us! I hate him for dying, for making you like this! Do you know how it feels to watch your mother cry over a picture of your father every night? Do you know how it feels to hear that every time I close my eyes?!"

Nate placed a hand on Ethan's broad shoulder. "Ethan, your father didn't want to die. You're going through grief right now, its okay. We're going to help you get through it."

"Let go of me!" Ethan shook himself off of Nate, making him stumble slightly. "I don't need your help. There's nothing you can do now." His voice cracked as the tears fought their way to the surface.

_So I won't give up  
No I won't break down  
Sooner than it seems life turns around  
And I will be strong  
Even if it all goes wrong  
When I'm standing in the dark I'll still believe  
Someone's watching over me _

The others watched silently as Ethan struggled to contain his tears. Once he was certain there were no more coming out, he straightened up. "I miss daddy." His voice was cracked and broken.

"I do too." Serena's tears started all over again as she lurched towards Ethan, falling into his arms. "You haven't called him daddy in years."

"I didn't have a reason to." Ethan hugged Serena tightly, wishing that Dan would come back and make their lives whole again.

"I might...I might not be long for this world either." Serena whispered, feeling Ethan's arm tighten around her.

"Mom.."

_  
It doesn't matter what people say  
And it doesn't matter how long it takes  
Believe in yourself and you'll fly high  
And it only matters how true you are  
Be true to yourself and follow your heart _

"I'm sorry sweetheart." Serena pressed her face into Ethan's chest. "I can't live without your father. You know that."

"I know..I just..I wish. Mom..you can't."

"I don't know how to live without him." Serena said miserably, careful not to let anyone else hear her.

"Can you at least try? For me?" Ethan's voice was soft, broken. "Mom, you can't leave me. Please."

"You'll have Blair and all of our friends." Serena continued, not listening to Ethan. "You'll be happy."

"That's not enough. I want you, mom." Ethan's body shuddered violently. "I _need _you...momma."

Serena shook her head, burying her head deeper into her son's chest. Sobs wailed from her, mixed in with the rain that wouldn't stop pouring on this already gloomy day.

Ethan wanted nothing more right now, than to bring his father back. But he couldn't. All he could do was hold his mother tighter, as the rain cascaded down. Sobs shook from his body too, but they were nothing compared to Serena's.

_So I won't give up  
No I won't break down  
Sooner than it seems life turns around  
And I will be strong  
Even if it all goes wrong  
When I'm standing in the dark I'll still believe  
That I won't give up  
No I won't break down  
Sooner than it seems life turns around  
And I will be strong  
Even when it all goes wrong  
When I'm standing in the dark I'll still believe  
That someone's watching over  
Someone's watching over  
Someone's watching over me _

--

Two months later, Ethan Humphrey was back in the same cemetery mourning the tragic loss of his mother. People say it was the pills, the drinks, but Ethan knew. He knew it was the heartache that killed her. He doesn't resent his mother for dying because he knows she and his father are up there somewhere, watching over him. But he'd give anything to have both of them back.

_Someone's watching over me _


End file.
